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Picture taken by my friend Cyndi Leos....thank you Cyndi.

Monday, January 25, 2010

To know my purpose is to fill my soul...

My soul and life's purpose are eternally intertwined. It is my soul that whispers to me, guides me toward what I know to be instinctively right for me...  To know my purpose is to fill my soul.

I hate it when I beat myself up for not being 100% productive or creative each day.  For allowing time to pass wastefully through my fingers. I must remember, to back up and receive it as an examination. Often, it can be an opportunity for motivation. A different perspective to find ways to be more productive. These insights  make my heart beat faster with awareness.

Spending time reading the blogs I follow, reading books, listening, often propels me and inspires me.  It is invigorating and challenging to see all the talent out there!  The support and the feedback has increased my  curiosity to investigate my need to write. Making it more of a priority.  Giving myself permission to pursue what speaks to my sense of purpose.

Self-acceptance seems a futile goal on so many of these days.  I strive to gravitate more in the direction of it than straining to find it.  Aging helps.  Menopause gives me the logic that hormones often took away. I am in the time of my life, where I sense, my time has come...

When I was younger, I would allow my lack of non-self acceptance to plunge me into distraction.  Setting me off in uncharted waters of self-discovery, only to realize I was reacting instead of taking action.  I have to accept my imperfections and get on with it.  As Julia Cameron says in THE ARTIST'S WAY..
" Perfectionism is not a quest for the best.  It is a pursuit of the worst in ourselves, the part that tells us that nothing we do will ever be good enough--that we should try again."

Do you ever feel certain periods in your life where you know you are in some kind of a transition?  I cherish those moments.  When clarity of thought, connects with a collaboration of efficiency and understanding,  enabling me to move further toward my goals.  My Mother always taught me to keep my nose to the grindstone until the job was done.  That is a good plan! That's the heart of everything.  Just keep going, step by step, never give up.  Never lose sight of your purpose. Like another book's title, FACE YOUR FEARS AND DO IT ANYWAY...

Today I made an awareness circle.  Drawing a circle, with lines coming out from the of the nucleus of the center to the edges of the circle, like spokes of  a wheel. On each line, I write the priorities which make my life worthwhile. It is an exercise to stay focused so I don't stray off course in distraction...

Having a strong sense of a major transition, on its way, is both exciting and unnerving. I cannot allow myself to not pay attention. I must not be fearful. There are intermittent times, in my life, when intuition tiptoes into psychic territory. When forces beyond my control are pulling me in a particular direction.  Strong feelings need to be investigated. I have to trust my instincts...

4 comments:

Lorna said...

I like the thought of keeping going, step by step...never giving up. Wish I knew my purpose more clearly! (keep wishing for that purpose-fairy to drop that clarity enhancing purpose dust on my head!) Julia Cameron rocks, by the way.

Marylinn Kelly said...

Change, as a positive force, seems to be afoot for many of us. I cannot say if it is a matter of personality or planetary influences, the fact that life seems to tell me what it wants to be and not the other way around. For me, flexible has become a significant word. And my purpose, if there is one, somewhere carved in stone, keeps revealing itself bit by microscopic bit. Perhaps some of us are more about doing, others more about being...and learning, in the process, to make friends with what is.

Donna B said...

Marylinn, May I be so bold to read between the lines and say, I hear you justifying a lot. For some reason, I feel myself drawn to you and your writing. I hope you come by often so we can collaborate, explore and discuss the interesting aspects that make each of us so unique. Flexibility is a very excellent quality in a person. I find myself more flexible psychologically and less physically..:} I am easy going but have flashes of great passion, thank goodness it is not all the time or I would surely burn myself up! It takes so many different emotions, thought processes, energy, willingness to risk, to give of the inertia to navigate our individual lives...I think it is so fascinating...again, I enjoy talking with you.

Lorna, Yes, Julia Cameron rocks. Have you read THE WRITER's LIFE, Insights from The RIGHT to Write by Julia? You might enjoy A PURPOSE DRIVEN LIFE by Rick Warren? Trust me, YOU HAVE A PURPOSE! Repeatedly, after reading various writers I admire, that is the one common thread I read...never give up. I read and hear from great people with fame, fortune and accomplishment, same thing, never give up. I have a very tenacious side to me...so when I focus in on something, I am locked in. I hope you stop by again...

JeannetteLS said...

I have three of Julia Cameron's books and was fortunate enough to attend one of her workshops--as in, she was there. I wore out my original copy of "The Artist's Way." A group of my friends once told me I was the poster child for "Go to Plan B." I think I learned a long while ago that planning was simply a guide to get me going, but that rarely would I wind up where I thought I would. And I like that, by and large. But now? The transition is first into poverty, then toa temporary respite. During that time, I KNOW that I will be devoting myself at long last to my callings in writing and art. I Shall try not to look beyond that. We look too far ahead sometimes and forget to live NOW. I am trying to do that--to enjoy parts of now. It isn't ALL tough. Some of it is beautiful. But I think I have found more purpose in my life when I simply shut the hell up and listen. Be still outside and in. Usually then, SOMETHING important bubbles to the surface and I go with it. Adaptability, and the attitude that life unfolds in its unique way, more often than not, WITHOUT our opening it up by force!